This is what it's all about.
For many years I have been writing my songs for myself alone, to cope with my experiences, to develop my being.
I will record five of my songs with sound and pictures. With these videos, I will then apply to every pub, every shop with a customer event and every cultural location in German-speaking Switzerland to be allowed to perform there.
The Songs
I have now selected five songs which I will record, mix and produce as video and audio recordings. They are very different in their kind and content, rather funny or rather serious, rather soft or rather loud, rather long and rambling or rather short … so I can present my stage program in an ideal way, so the potential bookers or then the audience of concerts get a good possibility to estimate what will be offered to them live.
Song 1: Aggressione My idea was to wrap the weighing of a fairground song into a bad song. Originally it was written at the piano with the typical way of playing, bumtätä, bumtätä. On the guitar now I translated this contradiction in a way that I pluck the strings gently, but sing with a noticeable, suppressed anger. It is about domestic violence, which seems to be okay, but then becomes more comprehensible in the failure of everyday things. And the inability to confront one’s emotions, to repress them until they explode, is what I depict. And that way may not be that great.
Song 2: Huutperfektion (Skin Perfection) I wrote this text on the train from Zurich to my home. On the table was a glossy paper magazine with make-up tips. I am mostly unmade-up, I just don’t see enough sense in painting myself in everyday life, every morning. Mornings are too strict for that. But I also fall strongly under the belief that I have to disguise myself in order to be accepted by other people. I had talked to my sister on the phone and she was angry with me, I did not understand why I had done something wrong again. Hence the chorus. I wanted to do everything right and I did everything wrong. Am I really that stupid? Does it have to hurt so much? The others make it look so easy. Going to work, meeting friends, eating dinner, putting on clothes, make-up, riding the train… I didn’t know what to do. Sleeping at home usually helps a lot. Or just … write a song about it to examine my experiences and make them accessible to others.
Song 3: Abflog (Setting Off) This is my first song. I was angry about myself, about my self-pity, and tried to process this with some humour. To find ground again. The song is still relevant to me. I still easily lose my footing, get frustrated, although I’m actually doing so well and I could be very grateful. I still worry too much, sometimes I simply see no sense in life, I get tired of everything. But these moments become rarer and when they happen, I can handle them well by now, from time to time.
Song 4: Weli Mängi Esch Jeh Gnueg (What Amount Shall Ever Suffice) This song is jazzy in its rhythm, the content is about standing alone again and again, somehow dissatisfied. Jazz is for me, and I think very limited, I know, but for me it is simply the style that is copied most miserably. For me, the flattest pop has more heart in it than the jazz that is usually repeated in school. Jam sessions have proven it to me again and again and have made me very angry again and again. For me it’s all about becoming your own genius. Not about imitating technical perfection to please others. Even though we all look at each other and no idea is new, I think it is essential to consciously AND intuitively let the experience pass through yourself and then express it. This is the moment where it becomes relevant. In the text I describe my perceptions shortly after my boyfriend at the time ended our relationship. I wanted to go back, even though it was clear to me that we no longer had a healthy relationship with each other. With the song I encouraged myself again and again to end and move on. And I sang to myself that it was okay if I didn’t solve this elegantly, with alcohol, self insult, frustration with ALL people … as long as at the same time I really go on and become positive again. So: it’s fine if play the same jazz again and again and again, as long as you develop somehow, somewhere.
Song 5: Glasschueh (Glass Shoes) For a while I was struggling with panic attacks and that’s what this song is about. I get them from crowds. Fasnacht, of course, or simply a cosy pub … if I open myself too much for people, then I feel them strongly inside me, I become them, or what I imagine them to be, and there is a lot of frustration and unpleasantness in dealing with each other. Unfortunately, I focus on these negative phenomena and at a certain point I get incredibly afraid of coming into the focus of these negative distributions of people. At that point I need a while to become rational again. The best thing is sleep.
This is what I need backing for
I only need your support for a contribution to my basic expenses like the rent for the rehearsal room and the depreciation of my equipment (aka my life). And I hope this campaign will reach new ears.